How to Protect Your Time and Energy This Holiday Season

A calm, grounded, practical guide for women who want to enjoy the season instead of powering through it.

The holidays have a way of shifting as life shifts.

Several years ago, my oldest daughter started spending Thanksgiving with her fiancé’s family. It was the right thing for her, but it felt strange not having her home for the holiday. Thankfully, my youngest has always made it home, and together we’ve created new traditions that have brought us a lot of joy. But I know the day will likely come when she can’t make it home either. And the same will probably happen at Christmas.

That’s the part of holiday stress we don’t talk about enough. It’s not just the fast pace, the packed calendars, or the to-do lists. It’s the emotional shift when life changes, and we’re still trying to fit ourselves into the old ways of doing things.

You may still be busy with holiday parties, work events, hosting, and volunteering; but underneath the activity, there can be a quiet sense of feeling a little lost. A sense of “What does this season look like for me now?” Your old traditions may no longer fit your new life, and you may not have created new ones yet. You haven’t quite made that internal shift.

The good news?  This is the perfect time to create a holiday season that brings you joy and meaning, not just the version you’ve always lived before.

Here’s how to protect your time, energy, and emotional well-being so you can do exactly that.

1.  Choose What Actually Matters (Values First)

Instead of starting with the calendar, start with your values and how you want to feel this season.

Ask yourself:

• What brings me joy in this chapter of my life?
• What traditions still feel meaningful?
• What am I doing only out of habit or guilt?
• What would make the season feel peaceful and grounded?

Give yourself permission to choose one or two priorities, not ten.  And give yourself permission to let go of things that no longer fit. This isn’t abandoning the past, it’s thoughtfully evolving into the present.

2.  Set Boundaries with Confidence (and Without Guilt)

Boundaries aren’t about shutting people out, they’re about being clear on what supports your well-being.  Every “yes” is a tradeoff. When your energy is stretched thin, saying yes to everything means saying no to yourself.

Try these simple scripts:

• “I won’t be able to make it, but thank you for thinking of me.”
• “That doesn’t work for me this year, let’s reconnect in January.”
• “I can help, but only with ___.”

You don’t need to over-explain. A kind, simple, direct “no” is enough.

3.  Protect Your Time with Small, Non-Negotiable Practices

Your rituals matter, even tiny ones.

A walk.
Morning sunlight.
A quiet cup of coffee.
A stretch break.
A consistent bedtime.

These aren’t luxuries, but anchors that steady you during a busy, emotionally shifting season. They keep your energy from being pulled in every direction.  Think of them as your personal “no matter whats.”

4.  Plan Your “Yes” Moments on Purpose (Joy-Centered)

Now that you’re clearer on your values, choose a few joyful moments intentionally.
Not the things you used to do because the kids were small, or because your parents did them, or because it’s “what you’re supposed to do.”

What brings joy now?

Maybe it’s:

• A holiday lights walk
• A cozy movie night
• Baking something you love
• A local craft fair
• A day trip
• Coffee with a friend
• A quiet morning to yourself

Joy often looks simpler in this stage of life.
And sometimes, simpler is richer.

Joy doesn’t have to look like it used to. This is your season to choose what lights you up.

5.  Give Yourself Permission for a Simpler Season

Your life has changed, and your holidays are allowed to change with it.

Permission to do less.
Permission to rest.
Permission to let traditions evolve.
Permission to create new meaning without guilt.

Simple doesn’t mean boring or uninspired.
Often, it’s exactly what your nervous system, and your soul, need.

6.  Navigating Changing Traditions with Grace

It’s normal to feel a mix of relief, sadness, freedom, or uncertainty as traditions shift.

When kids grow up, or family patterns change, the holidays can feel both quieter and emotionally heavier. You want to make the most of the time you do have…but you also know you can’t recreate the past.

This is where grace comes in. You’re allowed to feel all of it. And you’re allowed to create new rhythms that reflect who you are now. 

When the season changes, you get to change too.

A Final Thought

Protecting your time and energy isn’t selfish, it’s grounding.
It’s how you stay connected to what matters most. And it’s how you create a season that feels joyful, meaningful, and aligned with the life you’re living today.

Choose one small shift this week. Something that makes space for your joy.

You deserve a season that supports you.